Saturday, August 16, 2008

Getting Older

Today is the day. The big girl is officially in double digits. She's 10. And it's killing me! How did this happen? How is possible that she was just coming to us 10 years ago, and look at where we are now. Where did the time go?

We switched satellite providers a couple of days ago. We had to move the entertainment center out from the wall for the guy. That meant cleaning off the entertainment center. In the process of putting all of the movies back, I decided there was no time like the present to get rid of all the movies we aren't going to watch anymore. And I found a couple of gems that seemed really appropriate for the day.

When the big girl was four and the boy was 2, we attended a safety fair at our local mall. The good thing about that is that we found a spot that videotaped your kids for free. It was in case something happened and law enforcement could get a visual of your kids interacting in different ways: walking, talking, laughing, etc.

How sweet were my babies? Ohmygosh! I had forgotten how little the boy used to be. His little squeaky voice. And the big girl! She was even beautiful back then. We had the baby stand next to the TV while the big girl was on it, and talk about two peas in a pod. They look almost exactly alike. We figured how cool since the big girl was four and the baby is four.

What really strikes me is how bad of a mother I was at that point. I was controlling and rigid and wanted my kids to always behave in public. Good luck! I feel like fear is the tool that I used to keep them "in line". I could see the big girl just scared as all get out while they were video taping. I'm hoping it's because she was incredibly shy and not because she was scared of her mama.

Things are so much better now. I have learned that control is not what it seems. I have also learned that the only person I can control is myself. I can still discipline my kids, but it isn't for control, it's to teach them a lesson. They are people, too. They have thoughts and feelings and all the same stuff I have, only smaller. We have a lot more fun now than we did. I always say that the reason the big girl liked to go to school was to get away from her mama. I have apologized for the early days, and she seems well adjusted.

The boy said something really sweet on his tape. He was asked who his best friends were. He said his sister and his mama. How nice is that? I loved it. He earned brownie points for that one, and he wasn't even here.

He has spent all week with Oma and Grandpa. He wasn't happy that we went swimming yesterday without him. But he got to go swimming when the big girl was at the grandparents house. We pick him up tomorrow, thankfully. I think a week is too much for me.

We had a busy day today. We picked up passes to a glow in the dark, inside, miniature golf course at our local mall. It's supposed to rain tomorrow, but we don't have to worry about that. Because it's inside. All of the holes have glow in the dark things on them. Even the balls glow. It's really cool. We'll pick up the boy after church tomorrow and then go golfing.

We also went to Claire's so the big girl could pick out her bday present. She wanted earrings so we let her pick out some. They were having a buy 2, get 1 free sale. I tried to talk her into the multipack as often as possible. She wanted hoops. My hubby kept picking out earrings that had huge hoops. I found myself panicing a little. He asked what the problem was. I told him he needed to start picking smaller hoops. He pointed out that I let her get skull and crossbones. I pointed out that I was a lot more comfortable with our oldest daughter being a pirate than a ho. He laughed and said he had never thought about it that way. He picked out smaller hoops. I felt better.

Then we went to our local grocery store and let her pick out a bday cake. She got a chocolate cake with chocolate ice cream in the middle. I love an ice cream cake. Hubby tried to talk her out of a cookie cake. He didn't want one. I told him to get over it because it wasn't his birthday. It was alright because as soon as she saw the ice cream cake, it was all over but the screaming. It also had that hard shell chocolate topping all over it. And Hershey's kisses. And chocolate chips. And whipped cream not buttercreme frosting. My girl can pick a cake. Then we came home and had cake for lunch.

Tomorrow we measure her against the wall and see how much she has grown. We have all the kids do it every year for their birthday. They love to see the progress they have made during the year. It is fantastic. I even wrote down the measurements from the old house. Before we moved I measured and wrote them all down. I couldn't leave without them.

We are expecting birthday money when we get to the grandparents. The big girl has it all planned how she wants to spend it. I told her to get over it because she wasn't spending all of her money. We're expecting some in the mail, too. Lucky girl. I never get checks for my birthday. But this year and last I got my mom. Last year I had my sister, too, so I'm good with that.

The big girl may be getting older, but I can guarantee I haven't. Ok, I can guarantee I don't feel much older? Better?

Have a great day!

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